One of the earliest photos I recall seeing of myself was me, dressed in an LA Rams uniform, taking a knee on the front lawn with a ball in my hands and a helmet on the ground next to me. I wore number 74, because my big brother was playing college football and he wore 74, which was the number of our mother’s favorite Ram, Merlin Olsen. Like my brother, football framed my youth all the way through college, and so did the jersey number. When the Rams moved to the OC, we got season tickets and watched Eric Dickerson set his records.
Then somewhere in the mid ‘90s, the Rams left LA and my brother left the Rams. I think he felt really abandoned. We all did. For my family and me, that was pretty much the worst thing that happened in the 90s. But the Rams came back to LA a few years ago, and I came back to the Rams. Football was back in LA, normalcy had returned.
But my brother did not come back. When the Rams left, he did what a true LA fan always do – pick a winner. In LA, we love all the teams and we don’t hate any of them. We just only watch if they are winning. So without a team in LA, my brother of course became a Patriots fan, and Tom Brady became the focal point of all sports discussion in our family. Even after LeBron came to LA. But it was only when the Rams came back to LA that I learned my brother actually now hated the Rams. The wound would not heal. It will never heal for him.
All this to say, football kinda was the story of my life for my first 21 years. Today, I normally watch the Rams alone, since my friends really don’t care about football. Kellie seems to enjoy a Sunday afternoon watching a game with me, but she doesn’t go to bed smiling after a win and grumpy after a loss. I’m pretty lucky though that these new Rams are a “win now” type of team so money isn’t an object and we’re always in the mix.
So last week, after watching the GOAT win the Super Bowl game, my friend uses the opportunity to explain to me that soccer is a much more interesting game. Which seemed like an utterly ridiculous thought even though I’d heard it before from him. There is no resolution to a soccer game. My friend says that he can watch a zero to zero tie and it could be the best game he’s ever seen. Just watching the beauty of the game is enough for him. I asked him why they don’t just widen the goals a few feet to make the game a little more interesting, but he said something along the lines of, “it’s been that way for about 600 years, why do you think you can improve on it?”
This idea of enjoying the game simply for the beauty of it really is a striking idea though. I had to consider it this time, because CS Lewis hit me with something similar in the Psalms that same day. The Psalmist loved the Lord simply for his beauty. One thing I ask, this only do I seek – that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to see him in his temple. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
But sitting still and admiring something isn’t satisfying enough for me. I want a winner, an outcome at least or resolution. I’m more interested in the outcomes, what I get from this, than the enjoyment of the game itself. Lewis noted something about this. It seems that life after death – be it heaven or hell – was not a settled matter in the Old Testament writer’s minds. Even in Jesus’ day, it was up for debate.
Jesus did settle the argument, proving to the liberal Sadducees the resurrection evidence in Moses. But why did God wait so long to bring clarity on this question? Did God allow the Old Testament descendants of Abraham to go a thousand years without clarity on this matter, as a way to help them have a clear view of true worship – worship of God simply for who he is rather than what he gives. The decrees of the Lord are more precious than gold, they are sweeter than honey. Keep me from my hidden faults.
We American Christians have lost this. We are so transactional – close the deal. Believe to ensure you have fire insurance. Hurry up and avoid weeping and gnashing of teeth. If you die tonight, do you know if you will go to heaven? We focus on the prophecies, the day and the hour.
But one thing I ask, this only do I seek. That I may dwell in the house of the Lord, and seek him in his temple. To gaze on the beauty, to contemplate the glory.
Soccer, my friend, Lewis and the Word itself are a good convincers that there is enough beauty there right now.
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